STILL HERE

My assistant who has had the past 4 weeks off re tuns to work today - hallelujah! praise the lord!.

Unfortunately the frenetic pace won subside immediately at least for another week. Now I have to shift my focus to our end of year stocktake which I have to come in and work this coming Saturday. For me all the work is in the preparation so it will still me 10-12 hour days - yukky. It all caught up with me late last week I had to leave work I was feeling so craptastic, the Doc said I had a kidney infection (first time for that one) gave me some antibiotics and said if I'm not better my Monday to come back.

Well it's Monday and I feel a little better, but wished I didn't have so much work to do otherwise I would not have come in, personally I think I'm a little run down.

My eating over the past couple of weeks has been OK, just OK, I don't think there has been a day go by I haven't snuck something in my gob I should not have. I jumped on the scales today and was surprised to see I had lost from my last weigh in of a couple weeks ago - 119.8kg (263.56 lbs) a loss and under the 120kg mark.

Thinking back this time last year when I was really in the zone, I managed to get down to 121k (266.2 lbs) that's a grand total OF 1.2kg (2.64lbs) for the year - HOW BLOODY PATHETIC IS THAT

I've pissed farted around for the past year and let a lot of things slips, not only on the weight loss front, so I'm really disappointed at myself for that. On the positive side at least I haven't gained,at least I'm still trying and most importantly I still want the ultimate goal of reaching the weight loss shangri la.

TAGGED

I have been tagged by the the two lovelies - Nona and Cactus.

FOUR DISHES I LOVE TO COOK

Roast Dinner (Any meat with baked potato,kumara,pumpkin,zucchini and onions)
Cajun Baked Salmon Steaks (So easy Delicious and low fat)
Penne Pasta in my special Mushroom Bolognaise Sauce
I love making desserts like cheesecakes and lemon meringue pies are a speciality


FOUR QUALITIES I LOVE IN OTHER PEOPLE


Loyalty - someone you can count on in thick and thin
Humor - I love a good laugh and like to make people laugh
Honesty - Goes without saying
Directness - I like to know where I stand with people and abhor pussy footing around.


FOUR PLACES I HAVE BEEN

Bali
Malaysia
New Zealand
Singapore

FOUR THINGS IN MY BEDROOM

My king size bed - bliss,best purchase of 2006
My computer and workstation
Tallboy
Scales

FOUR DIRTY WORDS I USE

Most derivatives of F*ck particularly "F*ck me dead" "F*ucking hell","F*ucking wanker"
"F*ck wit"
Sh*t
Piss off

Let me add most of the time these are said in my own company or are thoughts, swearing and having a potty mouth in public is one of my pet hates.

As Aussies are famous for their sayings I am going to add another one

FOUR SAYINGS I LIKE TO USE

"Flat out like a lizard drinking"
"Useless as tits on a snake"
When being asked question that elicits a YES answer,"Does a bear sh*t in the woods?" "Is the Pope a catholic?" and "Does Rose Kennedy own a black dress?"
And my all time favourite when asking someone to do something and I get a negative response. "Gee I only asked you to take the garbage out , not donate me your liver!

Taking my daughter shopping today to get some things she needs to take away to camp. She has finished her exams, they go away for a couple of days next week, so it will just be me and the Oscar the wonder dog next week. Oh well at least he loves me unconditionally.

YOU ARE ENTERING THE TWILIGHT ZONE

Last weekend I went to a expo called Mind,Body and Spirit. There were displays there ranging from natural therapies, new age therapies and even fortune telling. Alison Du Bois (who the show Medium is based on was there) and talked on stage for about an hour. I must admit I find that sort of thing fascinating and have read a few books over the last 12 mths.

While I was there I had a session with a medium,while there were a few holes in what she said, there were a quite a few things where she hit the nail on the head so to speak.I told her at the beginning I wanted to make contact with my brother who died last year. One of the things she said he kept doing was sing this song over and over again. She said the song was for my mother and was my brothers way of trying to ease her pain. The song was "Tell Laura I Love Her" and since when this was first mentioned I am hearing this song over and over again. I was pretty taken back when Mick had it as one of his Music Monday songs - pretty spooky I think. It just seems like a strange song for my brother to pick as he wasn't even born when it was released, hell I wasn't even born in 1960 when it was released.


I bought a book while I was there titled "You are Clairvoyant - Developing the secret skill we all have" It is interesting and gives exercises to tune your mind and body energy. About all it's doing for me is sending me to sleep - ha ha ha, well at least it's a good relaxation tool.

I have been having a huge problem with fluid retention for the past week,by the end of the day my ankles are huge. I took this photo mid afternoon, my ankle has turned into a "cankle" and there is a ankle bone somewhere underneath the swelling, I think I may need to get my blood pressure meds checked it it doesn't improve.


I'm off to bed now to practise balancing my chakra's or whatever that is!!!

SWAN SONG

This post was going to be my swan song. I had decided to stop blogging or at least take a break away from it. I felt like I wasn't getting anything from it and in the 12 months I had been blogging my weight has yo-yo ed. I have had more ups and downs than a brides nightie on her honeymoon.

Part of the reason I feel like taking a break is I'm just so damn busy at the moment and do not seem to get time to do anything.I feel like I'm letting myself down and also letting down all the great and really nice people I have met in the last 12 months because I just don't have the time to be more involved. If anyone feels like that I'm truly sorry.

I spoke to my boss today to ask for a week off in early December. The court case for my brothers death starts and my mother wants to go which is understandable. It will on;y take a couple of days, I want to take the whole week as quite frankly I don't think I will be feeling emotionally great after the event. I was surprised if not a little pissed off at the reaction I got.

I got the third degree on why I needed the whole week,when it would take a few days blah blah blah. I got pissed off because for the past 4 weeks Ive been doing 10 -12 hour days. I have been working my ring off as my assistant is away and I'm carrying her can as well as mine, while doing work for the 2 new branches. For a spilt second I was going to cave in and say I could change it to 2 days as I was just too busy to have a week off.

Next,I open up my blog and I read a comment from my dear old friend Chubbymum and her "getting back on track" comment strikes a chord with me. I start to read some of your blogs, the first one I hit is Spidey's, he's feels like he cannot say what he thinks without upsetting some of his readers and is going to stop blogging in his current blog. I must admit I felt a pang of pain when he said he would stop writing on his blog we have come to love for exactly the same reasons he is getting flack for - his take no prisoners approach.

I don't know exactly what or why but all these things put the fire back in my belly so I have decided against the break. I found this picture and thought it was apt - Al, this ones for you and me

STRESSED OUT AND READY TO EXPLODE

Work is really pissing me off at the moment. Spending allot of hours there, up to 11 hours a day, every day, it seems I just come home to sleep, wake up and go back there.It wouldn't be so bad only for the a-holes I work with.

I'm talking about people who don't try the "self help" method first and disturb you to ask a stupid question that if they had bothered they could have found the answer out themselves. They also expect me and my colleague to fix every f*cking thing that goes wrong in the place from unjamming the photocopier to being told we have run out of coffee - like I'm the freaking tea lady or something or worse still their wife.

Yes, they are all males (sorry guys) and what makes it worse is my colleague runs herself ragged to do their bidding, while complaining about it and doing the old martyr routine. She then gets the shits with me because I am assertive (OK more like aggresive) enough to tell them where to go - so I'm f*cked on both counts.

Now don't get me wrong I'm the first person who will help anybody in need, what I can't stand is people who are too lazy to get off their fat a*ses and do things for themselves. Ok rant over!!!

Weighed in this morning and am recording a gain which I totally expected,it has though improved over the last week as the numbers were much higher. All I can do is keep plugging away and not use my current stress levels as an excuse to pig out.