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Monday 18 February 2008

A TOTAL DICKHEAD

Sorry I hsvn't been around much lately. Ive had alot of "shit" happening these past few weeks. Some things have been resolved and others are still hanging around and will continue to be there for some time.

I have been dealing with it the old way by 1. Ignoring the problem using the old Aussie adage of "She'll be right mate" 2. Procrastination and finally 3. drowning my sorrows in anything with a fat and sugar content higher than 20%.

When I get stressed I get sick, when I overeat I get sick , HELLO, you would think I get it after all this time.

I weighed in this morning and have gained 4.8kg(10.5 lbs), so much for my "Watch it Drop" tally on my side bar. It should read "Watch it Droop".

My Elimination Diet was a complete waste of time. I did finish the 15 days, but didn't do the reintroduction stage,to see if I had any reactions. The only thing I can say I had a reaction to is soy milk, after that I scoffed anything and everthing down. At the end of the diet though I did feel better in myself and once I got over the headaches and body aches in the beginning, I could notice a difference in my general wellbeing.

That of course was before I started on the self-sabotage exercise. I have only one thing to say about that - WHAT A DICKHEAD!. I am so ashamed of myself, I should know better.

So that's where I am, I have to start learning how to deal with my problems in a more constructive way and not make the situation worse by my sabotage.

Today, I have started to journal what I eat and count the calories and stay away from all the crap - AMEN!

10 comments:

the veggie paparazzo said...

I'm sorry you've been having such a frustrating time lately.

Chris H said...

Bugger. That is all babe, just bugger. I know where you are at, as I am too. up and down.... bla bla bla.

Steph's lifestyle change!!! said...

Its gotta get better!! I have had to go on reductil cause im a bloody yo yo up and down with my weight!!!

Think positive and it will all come together!!!

CactusFreek said...

Yay, you're back! [[HUG]]
Everyone has a vice. Unfortunatly we wear ours :o(
With overeating comes self-condemnation, and i really believe it's the self-condemnation that keeps us fat.
Febuary isn't over yet. There's still 2 weeks of it left. You can still salvage it. And if you don't,
Don't give up on the side bar drop thingy, start from now and remember Febuary as the last month that got the better of you.
I had to "Ewwww" at the soy milk. I hate it! :oÞ

angelfish24 said...

I kinda think all the diff. restriction diets just make us want to binge and eat after they're through. I'm a big stress eater too so I know what you are talking about, that's for sure.

I hope your feeling better soon and the stress eases some.

Meow Meow said...

I have heard and been told that journals are a great way to help us *see* what we are really putting in our bodies.

Chin up....

White Rose Boy said...

I agree keeping a journal certainly helps but at the end of the day you have to fight your frustrations. The person we all let down by binge eating is ourselves. I think any of us that try to lose weight totally understand your problem.

Saying all that you can't easily undo what you have done, every binge as just got to be followed by a new start, the sooner the better.

AL said...

Up, Up and away, the beautiful, the beautiful balloon!!

That was once a very popular song!

Don't let it bother you, every day you get stronger. Just think about the positive lessons that you have learned and apply them to the situations.

Tania said...

I think we all have it in us to go on some sort of a binge at times. It's recognising the damage and stopping the process that matters and you've already done that! So stop the self-loathing (let's face it it's not going to have a positive affect anyway) and move on from it - those extra kilos will be gone in no time and you'll be dropping it again soon! (Note to self - PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH ... LOL) - yeah one day i'll learn these lessons too.

CactusFreek said...

Miss ya :o)