WEIGH IN

A quick visit to record my latest weight.

115.9kg so a loss of .700 kg (1.56lbs) Happy it is still having a downward trend.

Back at work now and it has been hectic, hence my lack of postings and blog reading.

Having some trouble with my sleep at the moment. Have been averaging 5 hours of sleep a night due to a change in my anti-depressants for the past 3 weeks.Going back to see the Dr on Friday as I cannot go on like this as I am taking a sleeping tablet so god knows what it would be like without it.

Dr changed my meds as this is a new drug which they have had good results with people who have chronic pain like me. The first two weeks coming off the old meds and introducing the new ones were hell I must say. Pain was so bad I had to get some crutches to walk and was very teary.

The mood now is better and I feel like I have more get up and go and more importantly I'm taking less pain meds so in that regards there has been an improvement - it's just the damn sleep issue, so will have to wait and see.

Anyway better go work awaits!

WEIGH IN - WOO HOO!

Weighed in today at 116.6 kg (256.52lbs) which is a loss this week of 1.5 kg ( 3.3lbs) - go me!

The best part of all is I didn't feel deprived or hungry once and was able identify when I'd had enough. Fingers crossed I've found my sweet spot in regards to my restriction level.

So that's a total of 3.9 kg (8.58 lbs) since 12th October and I haven't even started to exercise yet.

Unfortunately my holidays are over and today was my first day back at work which was quiet, thank goodness due to my boss being away. I'm sure that will change once he returns on Monday - bugger!

Well I didn't cross much off my holiday to-do list but hey I must have done something right as everyone was telling me today how great I looked. I think my new hair colour and cut may have helped with that.

My daughter is continuing on with her final exams, she only has one left - drama and not until 12th November, so now it will be a wait for her results then to see what universities she is offered a place at, what see needs to do now is get a part time job.

Anyhow time for bed as I'm exhausted - ciao!

A WEIGH IN

My new restriction is working well I weighed in today at 118.1kg (259.8 lbs) recording a loss of 2.4 kgs ( 5.2 lbs).

Had a few problems with food getting stuck but really is my own fault as I didn't chew it properly on one occasion and then scoffed the food down because I was upset on another occasion.

I'm learning that taking the time to chew properly and saviour food has helped with the head hunger issue,as previously after eating my cup of food I would feel I haven't had enough to eat even though my stomach felt full.

As mentioned previously I want to get back to the gym these holidays but am finding I'm waking up with a serious headache every morning which dosen't go until mid afternoon, so don't know why that is, might have to get my blood pressure checked.

Anyway better go and start my ironing - dang!

FLUFFING AROUND

Since I started my holidays on Monday I have been fluffing around and not achieving all the great and wonderful things I planned to do.

My week so far has gone like this

Monday - Visit to Lap band surgeon and fill - 3/4 day

Tuesday - Fluffing around at home (not really doing anything) then afternoon with
the Tax Accountant.

Wednesday - Take daughter to school to attend study sessions,visit the shops and do
some groceries.Pick up daughter from school.

Thursday - Go into work for 3 hours (Yes I'm a sucker for punishment) then drop by
Tax Accountant to pick up our tax returns and find out how much we are not getting back - ha!

Friday - Go back to shops to try on this gorgeous top I saw, then come back home
to contemplate my navel rather than do some much needed housework.

So my first week is nearly over - egad!

Must be better prepared for next week this is what I want to achieve

1. Start back at the gym
2. Investigate aqua aerobic classes
3. Start my spring cleaning for Xmas
4. Go to the movies with my daughter
5. Spend some time with my mother
6. Visit my Aunt(who has been unwell)

On band news I'm happy to report my band is



I am now satisfied after my smaller meals and am not constantly thinking about what I can eat next. The downside is I cannot eat steak anymore as I tried some last night and no matter how small a mouthful I took and chewed the crap out of it, it still got stuck. So really for me it's a small price to pay for having the desired restriction. I have already started to drop some weight so all in all I'm happy with it.

Better be off and get dressed for my fluff around today - have a good weekend all.

NO WONDER I COULD EAT HALF A COW

Went back to see my Lapband Surgeon for a follow up visit - I have gained nearly 5 kilos since my last visit.

Then went and had a fill to find out I didn't have 6 mls in my band as thought but only 4 mls which explains why I have been so darn hungry all the time and gained some weight.I now wish I had done something about it earlier as February was the date of my last fill.

I now have 7 mls in a 10 ml band and feel very tight, which is what I want. I need to get into the "tough love" space again. It works for me.

I now have to be extra, extra careful with taking smaller mouthfulls and ensuring I chew,chew,chew(having said that I'm currently having trouble with a slice of toast I havn't chewed properly)

I'm currently on holidays and I plan to use this tiome to get back into the gym again but wont be going to today as I have a monster headache and am supposed to see the tax accountant later on.

Better go I feel like I have a brick in my chest - time for a PB!!!

HAPPENINGS

Life has been much the same - trying to stay "normal".

Booked myself in for a fill today as I'm able to eat too much of what I'm not supposed to eat - like steak for one thing. Will have to wait until the 12th Oct though.

I want to have the same restriction I had when I first got the band , I want it tighter than a fish's arse!! And you know that's watertight!!! lol!

Darling daughter has only three days of school left before she leaves - sigh! Where has the time gone. Then she's off on a HSC Study Conference for a week run by the Anglican Church.These conferences are designed to provide students with around 30 hours of supervised study for the week without any distractions like the TV,computer or games etc. This is a relief for me as it takes the pressure off me nagging her to "do some study"


I think this is a great idea for students to do before their final exams and I hope she gets alot out of it as she can stress out a bit over exams.

When she gets back I'm having two weeks off work before her exams start to make sure things are running smoothly, so I am counting down the days for that.

Anyways off the bed now to read my book - a Jodi Piccoult novel which is my second one I've read of hers and a little - ho hum I must say. I'm really more into mystery's and thrillers. My mum has lent me the new Dan Brown novel so cannot wait to start that.

HAS IT BEEN THAT LONG

Wow! Where has the time gone, I can't believe it's been so long since my last post.

We are still having issues with the insurance company, they want to pay us out a paltry amount and on top of that we have to organise trades people to fix the problem. The problem is because the job is a repair no one is interested in doing
the work - and there's supposed to be a recession on! The only company that gave us a quote wants to charge $6.5K to replace 1 x.900 (3ft) cupboard and 4 doors - WTF!!!

The second problem is we cannot match the existing doors and the insurance company is saying they wont replace all the doors so they match as they only repair or replace a "reasonable" amount. My argument is a kitchen is one of the main rooms of the house, right and having 4 doors which don't match the rest of the kitchen is unreasonable as it will devalue the house if ever we want to sell it. It's not like a bedroom or even bathroom that is not the main living areas.

Does anyone have any suggestions, because it's at a stalemate at the moment.

Since my last post,my eating has been up and down. At the moment it's good, I lost 3.8kg in a week, only trouble is since my last weight (refer the side bar) I gained 3.2kg, so even though happy with this weeks effort, I'm disappointed in myself for putting on in the first place. Fuck when will I ever learn.

The thing that has helped me this week is my daughter. She is doing the shakes again, having one for breakfast, and having protein and salads/veges for lunch and dinner,so I have stopped buying all the crap like ice cream and chocolate biscuits. Having someone else in the same boat definitely helps, so I hope we can spur each other on.

My daughter leaves school in two weeks,13 years of school are soon over. I cannot believe it has gone so fast.Her final exams are in Oct/Nov so she is busy with study etc. She wants to go to University and do a performing arts degree, so I hope she gets into her first preference, but it depends on her exam marks which wont come in until mid December.

Just a small comment on the band, it's coming up to nearly a year now and while I admit to working against it during some of this time, it definatley has helped me with the eating binges I used to have pre-band and I have lost 18 kilos and kept it off (apart from the small ups and downs) so all in all I still think I made the right decision.

Now I'm going to admit to something I wasn't planning to, but this blog is after all "my therapy". My depression has returned - to be honest it has never left but at the moment it's re tuned with a vengeance. It takes all my efforts to get up and go to work, I'm exhausted with acting out that nothing is wrong and I'm on top of things.I'm in the black bottomless pit and no one know I'm there. I think I know why I'm like I'm am but just can't see a way out at the moment - I need help!