IRONIC

Tomorrow I'm going shopping to look for some summer sandals. I want to make it clear now - I HATE SHOPPING FOR SHOES.

As I type this I can almost hear every female suck their breath in dis belief how any normal woman could hate 1) shopping 2) especially for shoes. Now what could be the reasons for this loathing of all things shoe like I possess.

You see I have the irony to top all ironies - I have very,very,very narrow feet. Yes, you read right, n-a-r-r-o-w feet. How is it that everything else on me is wide or pendulous and in some cases - both! The only dainty things I possess are my bloody feet!

Now it hasn't always been like this folks, when I was younger ( and thinner) I never had a problem, I used to get around in 4 inch heels, ankle straps , court shoes in all textures and colours . I used to be able walk without pain, run, and dance until the wee hours of the morning.I think at one stage I owned around 70 pairs of shoes - I was a shoe-aholic. As I got older and fatter my feet paid the price and thanks to oh, around 6 stress fractures in my feet over the past 7 years I can no longer wear a heel any higher than 2 inches.

So, my choices are limited somewhat. What really jerks my chain is when I go into a shoe store most assistants take one look at me and assume fat arse means fat feet. No no-no, not in this case honey. I recall one assistant commenting on how "thin" my feet were in comparison to the rest of me, my retort was "Well, I have to have something going for me sweetheart - ha!

I can see it now, trying on endless pair after pair, that are either too wide,too high, not enough support - yada yada yada . For once I want to have something wider - my feet, please god let me find something to fit my narrow feet or at least make the rest of me narrow to match!!!